Can you receive a compliment and respond with a simple, “Thank you.”? Can you accept help without feeling guilty? Do you take time to do what nurtures and replenishes  you? I have trouble with all these things.Last week I got the same message from several sources: practice receiving. In his Millionaire Mind Intensive seminar ([1] www.millionairemind.com), T. Harv Eker says that to make and keep a lot of money, we must become experts at receiving. Receiving. Hmm. Great at receiving.

I’m a great giver! I love giving gifts. For example, I’m far more engaged in what I give for Christmas than in what I get. I fill large chunks of time with giving my talents – organizational, emotional, and spiritual support . I give to my coaching clients, my friends, and the Pacific Mozart Ensemble.

The receiving message also came at the memorial service of a friend, an amazing woman who tenaciously lived her life in a constant state of both giving and receiving. For 25 years, three times a week, Patty Stewart spend 6+ hours on the receiving end of a kidney dialysis machine. She received care from nurses, technicians, doctors and her amazing husband, Kent. She really knew how to receive. And when she wasn’t receiving, she was very busy giving.  She had hundreds of friends to whom she gave her best gift – her love of life. When life gave Patty lemons, boy did she know how to make lemonade! She would come up with 5 recipes for lemonade and figure out how to share her culinary secrets with everyone, especially other dialysis patients who often thought they could never have tasty food again!

I got another message about receiving from a minister at Patty’s memorial. I had a wonderful interaction with Pat de Jong , who reminded me to balance my giving with receiving. The thought of receiving engrossed me all weekend, and one of my discoveries might just be the antidote I need for my 4 o’clock malaise. You know how I love metaphors. My 4 o’clock malaise is characterized by wanting to eat – to fill myself – to receive! Aha. Maybe I need more receiving.

Actually ever since I wrote the article about my afternoon malaise, I have been treating myself to daily reading  or listening to something inspirational and as I thought about this concept of receiving, I realized I had inadvertently addressed my own problem. (I do want to thank those of you who offered your own solutions. Some of you even called me at 4PM and others offered to go for a walk with me. Thank you all for your generous thoughts and concerns!)

Meanwhile, back to the idea of receiving. How am I nurtured? When I am so busy giving to others, how do I get nourished, rejuvenated? Duh! This is so much a part of my coaching of others, and I have totally missed taking care of myself. Oh, I do nice things like take naps and go out with friends. Those are nurturing. But what I am not doing is  refilling the emotional and spiritual well. How am I inspired? How do I take in spirit? Oh, that is sorely lacking in my day.

Yes, I do spend a few minutes meditating but now I realize that it isn’t enough. I need inspiration. How does inspiration affect me? I am so moved that I can hardly sit still. I want to sing and shout. I want to dance. I am moved to move! Often after I’ve coached a particularly good session or written a good article, I jump up and move around. When I read something inspiring, I can usually only read a few pages, then I have to do something.

I think all this movement and activity are an indicator that I have found the right medium. But I also think I am deflecting the inspiration rather than taking it in. I am not receiving it, I am only touching it. What if I just let myself be filled? That happens occasionally, but not nearly enough. What if I breathe in (in-spire) and let the feeling fill me? What if I receive the inspiration? Then what? I feel rejuvenated just thinking about it. And if I dance, I do it as a vessel for the feeling rather than a wall to repel it! I look forward to a spectacular week.

© 2006, Jacqueline Hale