November 26, 2007 by jacquie.

Did you know you are a genius? You are, naturally. Each of us has a specialized talent for something. This reminds me of a conversation I had with a woman who was lamenting that there was nothing special about her. This 30-year-old woman told me she asked her mother if she had any special talents and her mother replied, “You’ve always been good at coloring!” She was very disappointed until I asked her if she was good at staying inside the lines or maybe even an expert at choosing colors. Those questions got her exploring her Natural Genius and she realized that she was actually fabulous at choosing colors. Thank you to the moms around the world who sometimes unwittingly give us gems!

Here’s some help to identify one of your most precious assets:

·         What is it that you do in nearly every situation?

·         What do you do whether you are paid to do it or not?

·         You do it without thinking or planning.

·         You might do it even if you are asked not to do it.

·         What do friends and family ask you to do “because you are so good at it”?

Your genius is the thing you do naturally. It might be an activity such as organizing things, or it might be knowing what is true or it might be examining chaos to discover a different solution. Take a look at that last criterion because that is often the way people identify their natural genius—other people identify it for them. If you’d like some help with this exploration, you might sign up for my email coaching program at www.yoursecretofsuccess.com/serenity_info.htm. This is a program packed full of useful exercises at a price far less than a month of in-person coaching.

The real trick about Natural Genius is to have a career that utilizes it. That way you know you’ll be very satisfied most of the time. However, be aware that you’ll be grumpy if you don’t get to do it! If your Natural Genius is doesn’t lend itself to a career opportunity, be sure that your pastimes give you a lot of room to utilize it. There’s nothing more frustrating than an unexpressed urge, and your Natural Genius is always urging you.

My Natural Genius is Creating Wholeness. When I see a bunch of things or tasks, I naturally want to organize them into a cohesive something. You might have noticed that when I write these articles, I usually take some event in my life and create a coaching lesson out of it. I’m always trying to make purpose and meaning out of what I encounter. Sometimes this drives my husband and daughters crazy because they might rather have their lives in some disarray and not have me suggest some organizational thing that creates what I think is cool. Actually, as a coach I have to suppress this instinct a bit because coaches don’t tell their clients what to do. But I am totally grateful for this gift because I can always see at least one possibility for a client and help them discover other possibilities for themselves. No dilemma ever seems hopeless.

One of my favorite reactions is when someone discovers their Natural Genius and says, “Doesn’t everyone do this?” It feels so natural that we think everyone has the same gift, when, in fact, very few people have the same Natural Genius. I’d love to have readers post their Natural Genius as a comment to this article. Thanks.

© 2007, Jacqueline Hale

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November 26, 2007 by jacquie.

Isn’t that fun? Be happy, have better health. I got this idea straight from Dr. Christiane Northrup, MD, who is my favorite authority on women’s health. She appeared on Oprah a few weeks ago and talked about how emotional issues affect health. She spoke eloquently on the topic of women needing to take care of themselves first! I know that sounds selfish, but the best thing you can do for your family is take care of you.

One of the guests on the show was angry with the world. Dr. Northrup described how this symptom reveals itself in perimenopausal women (often beginning in a woman’s mid-thirties) because they are giving everything they have to everyone except themselves. The doctor’s prescription was to discover five things that are fun for you and make sure that happiness has an active presence in your life.

Since cellular inflammation is inversely reciprocal to happiness, the more fun you have the better your health! Interesting. I inadvertently did an experiment on myself after watching that show. I was fascinated by what the five things would be for me. At first I couldn’t think of anything. That’s odd for me, but lately my generally rosy outlook has been a bit gloomy.

For the past few months, some interpersonal stuff within our community of friends has upset both Jim and me. I haven’t written much about my frustration and anger because some in this close-knit community read my articles. However, the unrest has taken its toll with me. I’ve been grumpy, I’ve not been sleeping well , and I’ve been making less than wonderful choices about food and drink, which has added an unwanted 10 pounds to my already overweight body. Most important, I’ve felt spiritually disconnected and unwell.

Yesterday, I took Dr. Northrup’s suggestion to heart – thankfully, I could still recognize a good idea when it showed up. I started exploring the corners of my heart where pleasure hangs out. The first thing I came up with was dogs. Oh yes, dogs make me happy. Just thinking about dogs gave me hope. Over the next few hours I completed my list of five:

1.       Dogs, especially big dogs

2.       Snow, walking in it, playing in it, even shoveling it

3.       Writing about almost anything

4.       Buying and preparing food

5.       Nature, particularly trees and moving water

Perusing my list continued while I slept. I dreamed of walking Charlie in the snow. I’ve often noted that I like snow so much that even rain makes me happy because if it’s raining here in Berkeley, it’s likely to be snowing in the mountains. This is why our house in the mountains is so important to me – it fulfills all five of these categories in one place.

I awoke this morning more refreshed than I’ve been for months. I can almost feel my cells giving a big sigh of relief. Maybe those sighs are blowing out the flame of inflammation!

© 2007, Jacqueline Hale

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November 26, 2007 by jacquie.

Several weeks ago, I decided to get out of the internet marketing business. The work had possessed me. I was giving it my full time attention and getting almost zero response. After nearly a year of untangling the multitude of messages from internet marketing gurus, I was left confused, overburdened, and frustrated. I was spending money and working too many hours; and while I had created webpages, blogs, and articles, I wasn’t seeing the money. Finally, I decided that developing an internet empire wasn’t the way I wanted to spend my time.

Here’s the dilemma. Am I retiring? I’m certainly of retirement age, so maybe I am retiring. We have retirement income, so it’s feasible to retire if I stop spending money on internet marketing. I didn’t feel ready to retire, after all, I still love coaching and writing these articles. I thought I’d try on the retirement idea, and for the past month I have not done any internet marketing. I have been busy with things I really like. I made a quilt, I knitted two hats and three scarves, I peeled and prepared bushels of apples from my daughter’s tree, I read several books, and I worked on projects around the house and garden. Isn’t that what retirement is all about?

I loved all that activity, but I started to feel … what? Was it empty? Was it old? Was it purposeless? Was it all those things? Whatever it was, it didn’t feel great because I began having this heavy sense of missing the boat. Where’s the meaning in life if I have gifts to give and don’t give them? Quilts and scarves and apple pies are fine gifts, but I’m not done giving what has heart and meaning for me. As I’ve sat with that feeling and the question about definition of heart and meaning, I came back to one of my favorite activities – being with people who are sitting around the table sharing their stories and their troubles with people who have time and the inclination to listen and support. That often happens when friends and acquaintances join us at our house in the mountains. It also happens when people get together to work on a project.

Having thought that thought, I came up with this plan: to coach whatever clients come my way, to write articles, and to hold monthly retreats at our house in the mountains. I’ve done retreats there before, but they were structured as workshops. What I have in mind is more rejuvenation and less personal work. What I have in mind is low key, only three or four people. We might spend an hour each talking about what’s working and what needs help in our lives with a little brainstorming. The rest of the time we can go for walks or hikes in glorious Yosemite, or sit by the fire and read or whatever makes us feel better about life at the end of the weekend. I think it’s a good idea and I’m coming out of retirement to try it out!

Ah, six weeks of retirement. That was perfect. I think some people would have called it a sabbatical, but since I’m self-employed, that term didn’t occur to me until just now when I typed it. Let me know if the retreat idea appeals to you. Even if you can’t come to California to attend, it would be great to hear your thoughts on the idea.

©2007, Jacqueline Hale

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