Dealing with that Voice in Your Head

July 24, 2008 by jacquie.

You know the voice. It sounds sort of like your mother, or maybe more like your father. Whoever it reminds you of, there are times when you just wish it would SHUT UP! There it is, living rent free in your head, and constantly nagging you to do this or that, and always ready to point out the very thing you are afraid everyone will notice!

“You’re too fat.” “You always fail!” “You never finish what you start.” “Loser!” “Coward.” Is there any end to the possible dark secrets that voice seems to know?

Recently I heard my Inner Critic say, “You are never any good on the phone!” This was in response to my reluctance to make some follow-up phone calls. Well, no wonder I was reluctant, with messages like that grabbing at me whenever it was time to call someone. I got sick of tripping over the same criticism! I’ve heard it ever since I was a kid and required to call people from the phone book to ask what church they attended. You can imagine how responsive people were to that question!

Currently, I have very good reasons to make phone calls and I wanted to make them happily and freely. So I applied my trusty coaching technique to myself: How to Change a Limiting Belief.

·         What is the limiting belief? In this case it is that I am never good on the phone.

·         What actions do I take as a result of this belief? I put off making phone calls or make them much later than I should.

·         What results do I get when I act this way? My procrastination causes me to miss out on some business and occasionally I don’t schedule or confirm social events.

·         What results do I want to have? I want to connect with people in a timely manner and in an appropriate way and they respond as I had hoped.

·         What actions do I need to take to have these results? I need to pick up the phone and call people spontaneously and with great relish!

·         What belief do I have to have to produce these actions? I am a fabulous communicator by telephone and people are waiting to hear from me!

The funny thing is I make my living on the telephone. I actually love talking to clients and friends on the phone. I am a coach, both a life coach and a nutritional cleansing coach, and I love working on the phone! Why the dichotomy? As a life coach, clients call me. I’m just learning how to be a nutritional cleansing coach, and currently I have been the one initiating the phone calls. That’s where the voice in my head takes over. When it was time to make a call, I get cold feet.

I figured there were two things I could do: stop making calls or set it up so they call me. Then I realized that I always had the option to change my thinking. I am a fabulous communicator by telephone and people are waiting for me to call them! Yippee!

© 2008, Jacqueline Hale

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