December 7, 2006 by jacquie.

Last week I was anxious. I often noticed butterflies in my stomach or even nausea when I thought about the impending concert of the Pacific Mozart Ensemble. One of my volunteer activities with that group is to be the House Manager for the concerts. I oversee everything about the concert except the music: lights, recording equipment, box office, number of chairs, temperature of the room – everything.  Usually, I have a pretty good handle on the job.  After more than 25 concerts, I’ve handled all kinds of logistics from a complete orchestra with a 50 member chorus to gala events with catered food and champagne.

So what was bothering me last week?  Jim helped me explore by asking me if all the technical aspects were handled. He’s a clever guy, that Jim, because the technical aspects were not handled and there wasn’t anything I could do about it either, hence – anxiety. That answer satisfied my brain awhile, but then the anxiety crept back in. Eventually, all the logistics were handled and there was nothing left to do but sit and listen to the concert. Everything was running smoothly. The slideshow moved along automatically, the various recording devices were functioning, the narrator was lit, the late guests were seated, and the house was sold out. I had nothing to be anxious about. That’s when I got in touch with the strong emotion I had been keeping at bay.

It was a concert of spirituals with photos of slavery. What I felt in the middle of the concert was what I had tapped into months ago when I listened to the first rehearsal. It was deep sorrow that anyone could wreak cruelty on other beings. I feel the same way when I think of the American Indians or those who experienced the Holocaust or other genocides. The anxiety I felt before the concert was a fear of the sadness I was wanting not to feel. How does one deal with such strong emotion? Wise people say the best way is to feel the emotion fully. When all my work was done and I had nothing else to worry about, I began to feel.   

The sadness was quickly replaced by hope that was spawned by a note in the program: The music of slaves was full of sorrow, hope, longing, even joy, but was not about anger or retaliation. It’s almost unfathomable that anyone could respond to cruelty with such beautiful music. There was some sort of wonderful Spirit in those singers. No wonder the songs are called Spirituals!

Lesson of the Week

I learned a valuable lesson last week. I learned to look beyond the present emotion to what might be lying beneath. In this case, the sequence of emotions was perfect. When I uncovered anxiety and found sorrow, I was in exactly the right place and time to discover hope.  To be honest, I felt satisfaction in just recognizing that I was anxious. It is so easy for me to stay in my head and feel nothing at all, so that recognizing anxiety was a positive step. I hope that one of these days, my feelings will be automatically apparent to me. In the meanwhile, I know how to discover what I feel by taking a deep breath and scanning my body for sensation. Fear resides in the belly, sadness in the chest, anger shows up in the shoulders, neck, and jaw, and joy bubbles up the center to fill every nook and cranny.

© 2006, Jacqueline Hale

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November 30, 2006 by jacquie.

Deliberate Attraction really works! That’s the process I often mention by which you clearly define what you want and the cosmic waitress delivers it. Over the Thanksgiving weekend, I realized that Jim was actually going to retire by the end of the year and I didn’t really know what I was going to do with my own work situation. He had entered pre-retirement in September but no one had been found to replace him, so he’s been consulting three days a week to keep the current projects moving along. I think neither of us felt very strongly about that September date; it didn’t feel real before or after it arrived. But when we talked of or thought about a January date, it really felt solid. Suddenly the cosmic waitress did deliver and a former colleague of Jim’s found himself in the position to be hired, thus releasing Jim into real retirement!

My latest foray into deliberately attracting what I want happened on Monday as a result of my wondering what I am going to do when Jim is retired. In that magical time between sleep and wakefulness, I declared what I wanted in terms of private coaching clients. I imagined talking with them and what kind of coaching I would do – I got a very good vision of working with my clients in my new household situation. I currently have three but I’d be really happy with five. So that was what I asked for: five coaching clients who would be flexible enough to allow me to travel a bit when Jim is able to get away from his music gigs. OK, Universe. I am excited to imagine this wonderful arrangement.

An hour later, my email revealed that one of my clients was ready to go off on her own. Good for her. Bummer for me. Now I only have two clients. I didn’t let that stop me, I kept imagining my five clients and waiting expectantly. Within a few minutes (really!) I heard from a former client who was ready to come back and he wanted double sessions. Aha, now I have essentially four clients. Then before noon, another client wanted to work on his relationship with his daughter, so the daughter made five! All this happened within a few hours of my getting really clear that I wanted five clients! The Law of Attraction really does work. Now let’s see if the sample session I am giving turns into yet another client. That would still make five if we count heads rather than sessions!

This is what my upcoming teleclass is all about. How to set a goal and describe what you want and allow yourself to reach it! There’s still time to get into the December teleclass (four sessions, $100). If you want to practice a little, you can come to the last free informational phone call. It’s today, Thursday, at 5:30 Pacific Time. Call 641-678-3404 pin 153# and you’re on the conference call. Talk to you then.

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November 23, 2006 by jacquie.

You may have noticed that I often suggest making a list: list things you appreciate, list things you have completed, listing things you are worried about. Such an activity is frequently my solution to a situation. Sometimes I make lists only for a short time. A good example is making a list of things and people I am worried about. That activity really helped me because I became aware how worry was wasting my time and energy. Best of all, I realized that when I take action the worry goes away. I made my Worry list for a while, taking action as needed and sending blessings when action wasn’t appropriate. Then I stopped consciously making my Worry list.

I’ve written about my recent Success list, my bedtime writing of at least 5 things I succeed at during the day. This has been a great activity for me because many things on those lists are things I wouldn’t have given a second thought to. Last night, I listed completing a transaction and I also listed another success – feeling very happy about the transaction. Really feeling happy about something is truly a success!

Over the years, I have continued creating my Appreciation list in the morning. It tells the Universe that I want more of what I appreciate, which is really important in working with the Law of Attraction. If I am always focused on what I don’t like or what I don’t want, that’s what I get more of – more of what I don’t like or want. If I focus on what I love and what makes me happy, I get more happiness and more of what I love. It sounds simple, but for many people, it requires a huge change to begin to notice what you like rather than what you don’t like. Making an Appreciation list every day can really help  people to stay positive and to attract more of what they love. (Want to know more about the Law of Attraction? Register for the Teleclass listed below.)

Weekly Challenge

This week we have the master Appreciation holiday! What do you appreciate? What are you thankful for? Here’s the assignment. Tell five people what you appreciate about them! If you can, write a note or email because that written word can buoy them up later when they are feeling down!  When someone tells you something they appreciate about you, write it down and keep it in a special place with all the thank you notes and written appreciations you have. Then, when you need a boost, read these messages and feel the joy blossom inside.

© 2006, Jacqueline Hale 

November 15, 2006 by jacquie.

If you had asked me about business success a few weeks ago, I would have said, “I have failed at a few of my attempts at business.” It’s because of that thought that I have been exploring Harv Eker’s programs about success, especially his financial blueprint  information. Even though I’ve probably helped a few hundred people improve their health or their lives, I haven’t felt successful at business itself since I stopped being a freelance technical writer. I’ve been digging down to find the source of these thoughts and feelings, and along the way I discovered yet another tool that’s helped me find perspective: the Success Journal.

I often talk about keeping an Appreciation Journal to clear negative thoughts and inspire you to do even greater things. Now I’m suggesting keeping track of your successes as a way to appreciate and acknowledge each little accomplishment you have along the way to your big goals. For the past week, before going to bed I’ve written five successes from my day. They ranged from deep cleaning our bedroom to creating a flyer for an upcoming teleclass. They seem like little things, but when I reviewed them today, I realized that they added up to a mountain of work that I wouldn’t have recognized otherwise.

Some items were actually on my To Do list, but a lot of them happened spontaneously. I categorized them, just to check out the balance in my life, and I was happy to find an even distribution between business, family, friends, self nurturing, and support for the Pacific Mozart Ensemble. I had the feeling that I wasn’t accomplishing anything other than supporting PME, and I was surprised when the list revealed that not to be true. I had done many things that weren’t related to PME at all.

I asked myself why supporting PME felt bigger than all the other things I accomplished. I suspect it’s because most things I can do at my leisure but the business of being Executive Director has definite time constraints and people waiting for results. Otherwise, I’ve mostly organized the rest of my life to do what I want, when I want. So the scheduled responsibility feels more burdensome than my impromptu method of doing my other work.

What did I get from keeping this Success Journal? I was surprised at how settled I felt the first night and still feel after one week. When I reviewed my day, I realized that I had been far more productive than I had thought. Then, I actually congratulated myself for finishing projects and got into bed feeling quite content. I feel very satisfied with my productivity for the week, and I even had time to read a whole mystery! My enthusiasm is really high and I feel motivated to do more than usual! That’s a pretty good return on an investment of two minutes.

Also, I’ve given some thought to my statement at the beginning of this article. In order to be success-oriented, I’ll revise it to say that I have wisely chosen not to pursue a few businesses that I started. It is truly successful to decide to stop doing something that isn’t working! Hey, I like that.

Weekly Challenge

Each night before retiring, write at least five things you accomplished during the day. At the end of a week, check to see if your accomplishments are balanced  among the various aspects of your life. Also notice how your self esteem is affected by this brief exercise!

© 2006, Jacqueline Hale

November 8, 2006 by jacquie.

Can you receive a compliment and respond with a simple, “Thank you.”? Can you accept help without feeling guilty? Do you take time to do what nurtures and replenishes  you? I have trouble with all these things.Last week I got the same message from several sources: practice receiving. In his Millionaire Mind Intensive seminar (www.millionairemind.com), T. Harv Eker says that to make and keep a lot of money, we must become experts at receiving. Receiving. Hmm. Great at receiving.

I’m a great giver! I love giving gifts. For example, I’m far more engaged in what I give for Christmas than in what I get. I fill large chunks of time with giving my talents – organizational, emotional, and spiritual support . I give to my coaching clients, my friends, and the Pacific Mozart Ensemble.

The receiving message also came at the memorial service of a friend, an amazing woman who tenaciously lived her life in a constant state of both giving and receiving. For 25 years, three times a week, Patty Stewart spend 6+ hours on the receiving end of a kidney dialysis machine. She received care from nurses, technicians, doctors and her amazing husband, Kent. She really knew how to receive. And when she wasn’t receiving, she was very busy giving.  She had hundreds of friends to whom she gave her best gift – her love of life. When life gave Patty lemons, boy did she know how to make lemonade! She would come up with 5 recipes for lemonade and figure out how to share her culinary secrets with everyone, especially other dialysis patients who often thought they could never have tasty food again!

I got another message about receiving from a minister at Patty’s memorial. I had a wonderful interaction with Pat de Jong , who reminded me to balance my giving with receiving. The thought of receiving engrossed me all weekend, and one of my discoveries might just be the antidote I need for my 4 o’clock malaise. You know how I love metaphors. My 4 o’clock malaise is characterized by wanting to eat – to fill myself – to receive! Aha. Maybe I need more receiving.

Actually ever since I wrote the article about my afternoon malaise, I have been treating myself to daily reading  or listening to something inspirational and as I thought about this concept of receiving, I realized I had inadvertently addressed my own problem. (I do want to thank those of you who offered your own solutions. Some of you even called me at 4PM and others offered to go for a walk with me. Thank you all for your generous thoughts and concerns!)

Meanwhile, back to the idea of receiving. How am I nurtured? When I am so busy giving to others, how do I get nourished, rejuvenated? Duh! This is so much a part of my coaching of others, and I have totally missed taking care of myself. Oh, I do nice things like take naps and go out with friends. Those are nurturing. But what I am not doing is  refilling the emotional and spiritual well. How am I inspired? How do I take in spirit? Oh, that is sorely lacking in my day.

Yes, I do spend a few minutes meditating but now I realize that it isn’t enough. I need inspiration. How does inspiration affect me? I am so moved that I can hardly sit still. I want to sing and shout. I want to dance. I am moved to move! Often after I’ve coached a particularly good session or written a good article, I jump up and move around. When I read something inspiring, I can usually only read a few pages, then I have to do something.

I think all this movement and activity are an indicator that I have found the right medium. But I also think I am deflecting the inspiration rather than taking it in. I am not receiving it, I am only touching it. What if I just let myself be filled? That happens occasionally, but not nearly enough. What if I breathe in (in-spire) and let the feeling fill me? What if I receive the inspiration? Then what? I feel rejuvenated just thinking about it. And if I dance, I do it as a vessel for the feeling rather than a wall to repel it! I look forward to a spectacular week.

© 2006, Jacqueline Hale